Well, first, I'll do what feels like absolving myself a bit by admitting I'm tech-stealing the title again. I'm not exactly sure that's what the words are, but lately, I've thought so... Regardless, they're the soundalikes that work the best for my usage. [I know I've previously confessed to loving the use of "trick titles", & considering it for if-&-when I ever release any non-soundtrack album of songs,... But man, if I didn't regret all that about 5 minutes ago when I was searching the "Free Movies On-Demand" Channel! It's like your parents' "One day, you'll have kids, &..." speech for the "by-choice bachelors"!! (That's what I've taken to calling myself lately, & any that may exist like me.)]
Anyhow, about 12 hours ago, I was hand-writing a note to my best friend, letting him know all the things that have happened in the roughly-5-months between his birthday & mine. I've had a lot of physical pains, but I didn't mention them, as my belief is the reason I've had & survived such a large quantity is they each lasted for shorter amounts of time than it took me to write the note.
Therefore, at the top of my list was removing the "legal guardian" I had over the previous year. If anyone had been able to confirm for me, say, 10 months ago that I'd be totally free of it now (not entirely-finished with it all, but I took money from the ATM with my debit card this afternoon, & I've got a CD by one of my favorite bands that I haven't found available in town on its way here from Amazon, so good enough for me), I would've probably laughed, but eventually celebrated.
That all said ("wrote", if you wanna "get tech"), as I mentioned in the note to my friend, that's not really such a hot thing. As that Janis Joplin song says (my cousin would probably laugh to know I still remember hearing her "go nuts on it"), "Freedom's just another word for..." something else, & it's worthless, but free. Sorry, but who-knows-how-many years later, I gotta add somethin' to that. (Perhaps why my sister went through some time of preferring Scott Joplin, whereas I spent part of Thursday evening with Josh Joplin in my head.) If something were worthless-but-free, I'd be cool with that. (As I told Ma & my Aunt Wednesday night, I've long lived by the Dave-Matthews-Band-song-title of "Pay For What You Get".) But as I've lived my own life the past few weeks since that legal separation (which has included online interaction with people who seem to hold a mutual dislike for me, & others that have actually said they agreed with my opinions &/or liked my suggestions on things), I've learned that I've gone from not working a minute in my life (at your average paying job) to doing a ton of work, knowing all the while I'm not going to make any more money in total than I did 36 months ago, another time that I had no job, but one during which I also had no nieces. (As I told my brother-in-law this past Mother's Day, "Nobody who's seen me w/them will doubt I LOVE your kids.")
On my way out of this apartment a few afternoons ago, I told my Mom (also my driver that time, though she by-choice stayed in the car at our destination) that if I had a choice between being a Tony-winning, famous, published millionaire writer & being dead, that second, I would've chosen the latter. That day, I was on my way to a doctor's appointment to discuss a problem he'd already improved once, but which had since-then returned. At that appointment, he gave me prescriptions & instructions I have followed (the latter; the former would leave me stuck on the table), & I think the problem will leave again... So why did I find myself 24 hours later giving myself the same hypothetical choices, & still choosing the latter?!
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